30 April 2011

...some things that have come to light

So now that indoor soccer season is over, my gainful employment takes a bit of a holiday.  A good portion of my time that would be spent working with the kids and planning sessions and generally hanging out at the indoor soccer complex disappear.  This always causes problems for me.  And now that my kids are more independent, it takes on completely new dimensions.  You see, I am not a terribly organized person...nor am I particularly driven (well, productively anyways...).  I get a sort of "deer in the headlights" reaction when I have a load of time with "nothing" to do.  By that I mean other people -- bosses -- giving me schedules and direction. 
Because I have been like this for so long, my living space shows it.  It doesn't help that I have the pack-rat gene passed down from at least three generations...its going strong!  Looking around me, I realize that if I want to move forward, I must organize, make space for myself, create a comfortable atmosphere.  So I was at the ready when the season ended two weeks ago.  I've been to the charity shop several times with car loads, really, literally car loads...seats down, one occupant, stuffed to the gills car loads getting rid of years of collecting things that "might come in handy one day". 
The artist in me sees use in everything and anything, so this has been a difficult task.  But I am forcing myself to give it up as there is someone else out there that can use the stuff in my life time.  There will always be stuff for me to create with, it just doesn't have to be stored in my house! 
I can do this...I know I can...

..in this photo--missing, one GINORMOUS piece of white milk glass that was basically unidentifiable as to its use.  It finally made its way OUT of my house and into another by way of a royal wedding party gift exchange.  See, I CAN get rid of stuff!

19 April 2011

...no more excuses

ok...its time for action...I find myself easily intimidated by a great idea, usually to the point of not implementing.  It is time that I put this knee-jerk reaction aside and move forward with this idea of putting my knitting designs "out there".  I've thought about doing this for some time now, years in fact.  But I always seem to create as many (if not more) excuses as to why this is crazy as the project ideas I've gone so far as to put in a sketch book. 
My latest excuses are these:  ...if I start and I actually succeed, I wont have the time to keep up with it all (um, pretty bold excuse, how 'bout just start and see what comes of it all)    ...wow, all these knitters doing the same thing I am thinking about doing and succeeding-how can I really compare to all that (um, colleagues, not competitors, remember for me, this is a for-fun "necessity" to create)     ...what if I don't succeed (um, see response to excuse number one)    ...do I have the resources-money, time, space-to do this right (um, just look at the stash, and then glance at the recent calendar changes)...and the BIG ONE:  just where do I start???? (causing "deer in the headlights" syndrome)
Organization is not one of my strong suits.  I am afraid if I'm not organized enough, this will never work.  Then I go on an "organizing tear" through my house, and find myself productively distracted and sidetracked.  While this is much to the delight of my husband, it does nothing to really further this endeavor.  Oh sure, in a way it is preparation for creating a "working environment" -- I have always envied my husbands "hobby space" - where mine has been spread throughout the house.  That part of the dream is starting to come together...not ideally -- that probably wont happen until one of the "babies" moves out, some time off I would think.  Now if I could just turn off the telly...

...anyone else sensing a trend of useless excuses???